LIFESTYLE: Bozz, the Minimalist Part 2
Clothes
As I mentioned, watching The Minimalism Series by Rachel Aust has been a great help in starting my journey. When I was looking through the playlist, I immediately clicked on the video about clothes hoarding because I own SO MANY clothes, like its ridiculous. It was so bad that every time I walked in my closet I felt suffocated so I tried to spend the least amount of time in there as possible. The fact that someone like Rachel could transition to minimalism gave me hope.
The first thing I did when I returned to Atlanta from Spring Break was clean out my closet and drawers. This was actually a project I started in February but once I returned I kicked it up a notch. I'm not perfect, my closet is still a work in progress but I try to toss 3-5 things out a day (yes, I have that much stuff). It's really hard for me because I feel connected to everything. If I've ever worn it on a date, or when I did something cool with my friends or took a really nice picture in it I want to keep it. I know, I'm strange. Pray for me y'all. The Minimalist essay Letting Go of Sentimental Items helped me to realize that I don't need to keep material things in order to keep the memories attached to them because the memories are inside of me. You better believe I tossed out crop tops that I wore to life changing parties my freshmen year, as well as some "favorite" t-shirts that were only my favorite because they reminded me of high school when I had no responsibilities. I also found myself tossing out items that no longer matched my style, or just didn't fit. I tried on A LOT of clothes because I wanted to make sure that I was comfortable and looked good! Why would I own something that doesn't make me feel like Beyonce when I put it on?
Another thing I learned from Rachel that helped with my purging, was creating a pallet for my wardrobe. I decided that I am only going to wear navy blue, olive, soft pinks, black and white. Anything that wasn't those colors got thrown out. There are one or two exceptions for items that I really like so for now those can stay, but I don't own any yellow, orange, green, purple, red, or powder blue etc. My reason for doing this was to ensure that most of the items I own can be mixed and matched. And those also happen to be the colors that look best on me. While I'm sure some people can match loud colors with plenty, I am just not that fashionably inclined.
After giving away so many clothes I didn't feel like I left myself much to work with. So, I used my newly created wardrobe color pallet and 'Style' Pinterest board to do some shopping while I was on vacation.
I must say this was one of my favorite shopping trips ever! Because I knew the exact items my closet needed and the colors I "wasn't allowed" to buy, I bought items that could be matched with things I already own. Now when I leave the house, 90% of the time I feel comfortable and confident in the clothes I have on. I have less clothes to look through and only pieces that I love to choose from. If you guys would like to see the items I bought while I was in New York, tweet me and I'll make a separate post for that!
Ditching social media (part-time) has changed my life. Thank you Rachel Aust, again.
I realized that constantly getting notifications from Twitter & Instagram caused me to open the applications more often than necessary. Before I realized, I would be scrolling for 45 minutes! So I turned my notifications off on both apps about three months ago and I've felt much more peaceful since. Although I do sometimes want to scroll when I'm bored, I am no longer picking up my phone to be notified that 12 of my followers liked a tweet from Marc Lamont Hill then retweeting viral videos for an hour.
Spending less time on social media has brought me clarity on my own opinions of happiness, success, and love. It is crazy the amount of pressure social media puts on us that we don't even realize! I was constantly comparing my relationship to pictures of couples I'd see on my Instagram explore page without having any knowledge of what truly goes on in their relationship. Comparing the number of likes on my photos to that of a tea-selling Instagram model. Or comparing the success of my entrepreneurship to YouTubers who have been building their platform for over 10 years. Once I put my phone down I asked myself: "Am I truly unhappy, or do I just want what others have?" "Do they really have it, or do they seem to have it?" "How can I work to attain these goals for myself?" "Am I using social media to help others, or self-glorify?" When it was all said and done, the truth was ugly. I immediately began to define happiness, success, and love on my own terms:
Happiness, to me looks like genuine laughter + smiles, peace, clarity, fullness.
Success, to me looks like passion, progression, opportunities, expansion, effectiveness.
Love, to me looks like communication, understanding, growth, vulnerability, affection, intimacy, assurance, secure..
I could go on for days so I hope y'all get the point.
Once I realized that I had a majority of these things I felt a cloud lift from my spirit. After I minimized my distraction of social media, I was left with the feelings it gave me: doubt, insecurity, frustration. From there I had two choices 1. let these feelings overtake me or 2. decide how this realization can add value to my life. I chose the latter. I tackled my insecurities, and I am now using my social media with intention (for the most part).
If you follow me on Instagram, then you've probably noticed I haven't been posting the way that I used to. Less selfies, more information. Recently I've been trying to share more of the things that bring me joy (friends, art, work, outings) so people can see the world through my eyes. While this is important for career purposes, I also felt it needed to be done because my page was beginning to look like Selfish. How annoying.
As I mentioned in Part 1, minimalism to mean means adding value. Eliminating access so things that matter shine brighter. After detoxing from social media I now have a new appreciation for myself, my relationships, and my own opinions!
Values
If you don't take anything else from this post, remember this: identify your values. I know you're probably like "I know my values", but I am telling you there is nothing like writing them down, seeing them every day, and using them as the foundation of your decisions. It was been life changing. The Values episode of The Minimalists podcast changed the way I think, forever. In this episode they state that there are 4 types of values: Foundational, Core, Minor, and Imaginary.
Identifying my four types of values actually took a very long time because it was hard for me to differentiate between foundational and core, but once I finished my chart I felt invisible.
I now consider my values before every decision. Every tweet, outfit, outing, conversation, commitment etc. If something doesn't align with my values, why waste energy on it? I find myself saying "no" to a lot of things and I must say that I have never felt better! I am also realizing that I don't have things in common with a lot of people. Going to the same school or living in the same apartment building doesn't automatically align your values with those of the people around you. It is alright to not want to hang around the same people anymore or work at the same job once you identify your values. You can create more time to spend alone with your thoughts, work on project you keep putting off, or finally apply for the job that fulfills your passion.
I will admit the transition to intentionally applying my values every day has cause friction in some of my friendships. Because I value my peace, I don't force myself to do things that are going to cause me anxiety, stress or frustration. A lot of people have a hard time understanding why/how I do this. My explanation is simple, I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling drained and irritated, so I eliminate anything that has the potential to make me feel that way. Some people may feel like I'm brand new or switching up but I am simply just protecting my peace. Whenever I start to doubt if I'm making the right decision I remember these wise words from Ryan Nicodemus, "Minimalism didn't change my values, it helped me discover what my values are." I am not shifting my values in order to avoid things/people, but I am minimizing excess in order to avoid negative emotions.
Identifying my values and intentionally incorporating them into my life has made me a better daughter, friend, partner, writer and woman. I feel that every day is lived to its full purpose, whatever that may be. I am no longer doing things to keep me "busy", but instead focusing on what can make me positively impactful. Instead of trying to please everyone around me, I am making sure that my soul is nourished. I feel happy, complete, motivated and most of all, self-loved.
Overall, I can confidently say that my journey to minimalism has added value to my life and I am just in the beginning stages! One of the things I love most is how it is impacting my loved ones. My obsession with it has sparked curiosity in their minds and I can see them beginning to live more intentionally. I am excited to see how we all minimize in order to maximize together.
Every day I learn new things about minimalism and how I function within it, so I will be having a lot more minimalist content coming your way! I am currently making over my walk-in closet, redecorating my room, and researching how to start a plant-based diet! If there are any specific topics you want me to discuss, minimal-related or not, please reach out via Twitter, Instagram , or email.
Until next time, stay beautiful!
Rozza
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